"Lisa Landry says stand-up is better than acting."

By Jason Tanamor

Comedienne Lisa Landry began doing stand-up because she kept on getting fired from her job. And that's a good thing. Not getting fired, but getting into stand-up comedy. That's because, Landry is one of the funniest comedians working today. Zoiks! Online recently called in to chat with her.



Click on the link to listen to the interview with Lisa Landry.

http://www.mediafire.com/?hmgwzgkjjnq



BYLINE:

Jason Tanamor is the Editor of Zoiks! Online. He is also the author of the novels, "Hello Lesbian!" and "Anonymous."

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“There is ‘Chaos’ ‘Inside.’” – DVD Reviews.

(3 reviews for the price of 1)

By Bob Zerull

I don’t know why I do it. Whenever I hear that something is disgusting or disturbing I feel the need to see if it’s true. Torture Porn as they call movies like “Hostel” or “Saw” ruined good, scary horror movies. Sick stuff doesn’t scare me. It may make me cringe or feel sick, but I’m not scared. Two of the scariest movies I’ve seen in a long time are “The Strangers” and the foreign film titled “Rec” (which was later remade as “Quarantine”). Neither movie relied on gore. It was the unknown that scared you.



This brings me to the first of my three movie reviews, “Chaos.” From what I understand, “Chaos” was a failed attempt at a remake of the Wes Craven classic “The Last House on the Left.” I loved “Last House,” because it seemed so real. It was like they were taping these people torturing these girls, which scared me to death because it was so real. In the end, the parents of one of the girls turn the table on them.

“Chaos” is almost the same exact story. The problem with “Chaos” is that it is just plain stupid. The acting is horrific. The only thing that is done even remotely well is the use of effects. When they are torturing this girl the camera doesn’t cut away and it looks like they really did what they did to her. They succeeded there, but everywhere else was a flat out miss.

The characters are as dumb as they come in a horror movie. I’ll forgive some level of stupidity in a horror movie. For instance, in the movie “Wolf Creek” the characters make some pretty bad decision that end up getting them killed, however I can see those decisions being made in the heat of the moment.



In “Chaos” it’s just ridiculous. In the history of movies I feel safe in saying that the two cops in this are the two stupidest characters ever - I am not exaggerating. The worst part of the whole movie is the crappy ending. In “Last House” the bad guys get tortured by the parents of one of the victims.

*SPOILER*

In “Chaos” you think that is going to happen, but then all of the sudden the main bad guy survives - it’s just stupid.

*END SPOILER*

Please don’t ever see this movie, the filmmakers don’t deserve your money.

Movie number two is a French film entitled “Martyrs.” This is a movie that started off with so much potential. It begins with a girl who is trapped in some dungeon. She’s clearly being tortured, but you don’t really know how or why. She escapes and becomes an orphan where she befriends another little girl. Fast forward to when they are in their late teens/early twenties, the tortured little girl returns to the home where she is tortured and murders a family. It is one amazing scene. It is brutal and horrifying. It’s not because of the gore, although there is plenty of it, it’s the intensity behind it. The fact that we don’t really know if this is the house where she was tortured or not keeps it that much more freaky.

The girl’s friend comes to try to save her/get her out of there, but with no luck. Then the movie just goes crazy. I’m not going to tell you how it goes crazy, because it would spoil the movie. I personally think where they went with this movie sucks. It is incredibly original. It took me a couple days to decide if where they went was good or bad. If any of you do see this movie and want to discuss it please email me, because it is in a way a fascinating idea, I just don’t buy into it. Why would someone go to all that trouble for that? You’ll have to check out the movie to understand.



Finally another French film titled “Inside.” Again, this is a movie that started off with a ton of potential. It is about a pregnant lady who apparently lost her husband in a car accident in which she was driving. The night before she is going to be induced into labor this crazy woman comes over and is pounding on the sliding glass door. There are some terrifically scary images here. The woman on the outside, you never really get a good look at her. The cops are called and once they arrive, it appears as if the lady is gone. The pregnant woman goes to sleep. Next thing we know, the crazy woman on the outside, is inside (hence the title).

At this point the movie starts to head down the path of crappy. Once the crazy woman gets inside, she tries to cut open the pregnant lady and take the baby out. The movie was so good up to this point that this didn’t really bother me. The pregnant lady manages to get to safety. In the mean time two guests and three cops come by and none of them manage to save this poor girl. I said the cops in “Chaos” were the stupidest characters in the history of movies, and I stand by it. The cops in this tried very hard themselves. I don’t understand it. I know five cops personally, none of which are stupid. Needless to say, the climax of the movie is the showdown between the pregnant lady and the crazy woman.

*SPOILER*

The pregnant lady manages to burn the woman that is attacking her. Just as she’s about to escape to safety, one of the dead cops gets up looking like a zombie (there were no zombies in this movie up to this point) and attacks the pregnant woman. The crazy woman apparently survived the burn. The pregnant lady then all of the sudden goes into labor, the crazy woman delivers the baby, you find out that at the beginning of the movie, in that car accident the crazy woman miscarried, which is why she’s after this one. Don’t bother trying to figure this out, because really it is just stupid. The final scene is of the burnt crazy woman sitting in a rocking chair with the new born baby that somehow survived all of this.

*END SPOILER*

So to sum it all up, stay away from “Chaos” and “Inside.” They are incredibly gory movies, but they are such bad movies that there is really no point in seeing them. See “Martyrs.” While I hate where the movie went, it is still interesting and I’d love to debate/discuss it with anyone.



BYLINE:

Bob Zerull is a frequent movie and concert goer who talks about his ventures to arenas and theaters more than any person should be aloud to do. Now, he puts them down on paper. Email him your thoughts at: bzerull19@gmail.com. Also visit: www.cadaverchristmas.com.

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"Lisa Loeb on YouTube."

By Jason Tanamor

Lisa Loeb is one of the most successful female musicians on the scene today. Her new album, "Camp Lisa" is in stores now. Zoiks! Online had the pleasure of sitting down with her for an interview. Check her out here on YouTube.





Also check out the interview Zoiks! Online did with her:

"Lisa Loeb has staying power."

BYLINE:

Jason Tanamor is the Editor of Zoiks! Online. He is also the author of the novels, "Hello Lesbian!" and "Anonymous."

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“The Meat Puppets’ name is cool, and that’s the entire story behind it.”

By Julia Barr

The Meat Puppets have been playing music for decades yet a lot of people have never heard of them. The punk/country band’s Curt Kirkwood recently chatted with Zoiks! Online to talk about their favorite songs, their approach to music, and random stickers on their instruments.



Q - Do you remember the first song you ever wrote?

A - Yeah, I was really young. I used to write these joke songs with my friend Sam in fourth grade - this one was about these two horribly deformed people, this guy with no face and this girl with really horrible acne who worked at a soda fountain, and in they end they met and fell in love. I really didn’t start seriously writing songs until the Meat Puppets. Before that I just did cover songs.

Q - I noticed that you do a lot of cover songs and put your own spin on them. One of the first Meat Puppets songs I ever heard was your version of “Tumbling Tumbleweed” and I was amazed by how different it sounded. How do you pick the songs that you cover?

A - We just play our favorites. “Tumbling Tumbleweed” was a childhood favorite. I know a lot of people cover songs and try to make it sound exactly like the original band, but I’ve never been a good enough singer to make it sound like the original band, so it just ends up sounding like us.

Q - You guys were one of the first bands on SST records. How did you get started on label?

A - We toured with Black Flag, and Greg Ginn asked us if we wanted to put out a record. I think he had really good taste, there were lots of great bands on that label and I don’t think it was an accident. I think he knew what to look for and that’s something I would never have a clue about.

Q - Something that really sets the Meat Puppets apart from other punk bands is the country element to your music. Did you guys listen to country music growing up?

A - Yeah, it was just around a lot, we’d hear it on the car radio. We grew up going to the racetrack every Sunday. We were raised on a small farm, did 4-H, we had goats and chickens.

Q - Do you still go to the racetrack now?

A - No, now I don’t really want anything to do with horses. I mean I like them ok and all, they’re good animals but, horses are big and scary.



Q - When you write songs, how do you approach it? Do you write together or separately and then combine it?

A - Well, Cris (Kirkwood) has only written a couple songs, it’s usually all me. I’ll write a song and Cris will add the jazz rock fusion part. Collaboration is kind of a mystery to me. I collaborated with a friend for some songs on “Snow,” but I usually write by myself.

Q - Do you write the lyrics first or the music?

A - I write the music first and the lyrics come after.

Q - What amazed me the most about seeing you live was the insane speed and energy that you played with; even the mellow songs were sped up and intensified. How do you get yourself pumped up before a show? Do you have any certain rituals?

A - I think it’s mostly just carelessness. We get going on a tour, and it gets boring after you play it so many times, so we get going fast and hardly even notice it. I actually think we could chill out sometimes and play it the way it sounds on the album. I think we sort of blew it with “Up on the Sun.” That was a nice record and when we played it live, we just trashed it. I also think it’s societal. We’ve always played fast but now society’s caught up to us. People want their teeth to be extra, extra, extra fucking white! They brush their teeth with intensity! And because that’s how it is, we can play folk songs like idiots and it works (laughs). It’s definitely a show-to-show thing too, like the last show we played in Waterloo; the gig was in the toilet from the get-go. Chad was drunk, we didn’t know how it was gonna turn out, so we just tore it up, and it was total mayhem, but people liked it. Other times we’ll play a show thinking “here’s a show for the listeners” and play everything really nice and precise. It all kind of depends on who’s there, and how we’re feeling. I don’t have a set list; I always make it up as I go. A show is really like a conversation, you to the audience, the audience to you; it’s a set of feedback.

Q - What have been the best shows on this tour so far?

A - We just played Summerfest in Milwaukee. It was outside. There were lots of people, and fireworks. That was pretty crazy. That and the show at Ribco were both good.

Q - On “The Monkey and the Snake,” you whistled throughout the entire song. Do you have to practice whistling like that or are you just a naturally gifted whistler? That was one of my favorite songs on the new album. What was your inspiration for it?

A - I’ve just always liked to whistle. I wrote the lyrics when we were recording “Sewn Together,” but I wrote the first half of the song a couple years ago. The tune came from this 19th century statue that my grandpa used to have. It was a wooden statue of this guy leaning against a lamppost, and when you’d wind it up his head would go back and forth and he would whistle. It was connected to a music box and there was other stuff on the music box too, stuffed birds and things. I’m not sure if the tune from the “Monkey and the Snake” actually was the tune it played, but it’s what I think of when I think of that tune.



Q - I noticed some sort of stickers covering your guitar. They looked to me like cat stickers, but I could be mistaken. What kind of stickers are they?

A - Clowns, they were just the kind of stickers you get from a little kid’s birthday party or something.

Q - Is there a story behind the name the Meat Puppets?

A - Not really, I just thought it was a cool name.

Q - How do you think things have changed, with music in general? And how have you guys changed as a band?

A - I don’t think we’ve changed much as a band, we’ve just gotten older. But music today, it’s been a while since I’ve heard anything that really floored me and made me think, “that’s just neat and stuff.” I have a buddy who puts out foreign compilations. His label is called Sublime Frequency. He put out one with pop music from Cambodia; he’s done Burmese music and Algerian music. He’ll go to the countries and rip stuff off from public libraries, or record off of the radio. Those are really fun records. Most of the (American) popular music I hear now is just not as satisfying. I think the majority of music today is full of too much weird emotion. It’s all, “poor me, my computer won’t work, mom and dad don’t give me enough attention” - just whiny pop crap. With my own music I’ve always thought the best thing was to pretty much leave emotion out of it. I mean, you’ve got it built in with the sound, but listening to the “crying of someone’s inner self,” that’s just about the last thing I wanna hear.

Q - What would you say you do want to hear? What makes a piece of music resonate with you?

A - I want to have chills running down my spine, feel elevated. It’s just this indescribable passion; beyond emotion. It’s hard to put into words though because words can’t really touch it. Writing about music is like dancing about architecture.

Q - What’s one of your favorite Meat Puppets songs?

A - Right now, my favorite song off of the new album is “Go to Your Head.” I liked a lot of them but that’s definitely one of my favorite ones to play. I really like the title track, “Sewn Together.”

Q - Where did the idea for "Sewn Together" come from?

A - I had a painting that I’d done, the one with the stitches on the cover of the album, and then I wrote the song, and so we just decided to call the album that. I have to create this product, for the masses, and come up with a clever name for a collection of songs, and it’s actually a pretty cool thing sometimes to call it something more abstract than the collection of songs itself. I did that on “Too High to Die,” named the album something that wasn’t in any of the songs on the album, but for this one, “Sewn Together” just fit.



BYLINE:

Julia Barr is a creative writing major at University of Iowa who is obsessed with music of almost all genres. Check out her Facebook or shoot her an e-mail at julia-barr@uiowa.edu.

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“Juston McKinney hangs up his blue collar patrol officer job for the Blue Collar Comedy Tour.”

By Jason Tanamor

Fans of the popular Blue Collar Comedy Tour may recognize Juston McKinney from the Next Generation of Blue Collar Comedy guys. Aside from McKinney, the tour consists of Jamie Kaler, John Caparulo and Reno Collier. McKinney, who also appeared on the hit show, “King of Queens,” took time out of his busy schedule to speak with Zoiks! Online.



Q – You were once a patrol officer. It seems like there are a lot of ex-cops going to stand-up comedy. Mike Armstrong and Billy D. Washington to name a couple. What is it about cops going on to be comedians?

A - I'm not sure. You see a lot of funny stuff as a cop and I think you need to have a good sense of humor to be able to deal with some of the situations you find yourself in. I think also it feels good as a comedian to have people pay to listen to you instead of as a cop where people have to listen to you.

Q – Do you find yourself missing being a patrol man?

A - At times. Especially this year. I was hired when I was 19 and this December I would have had 20 years in and could have retired with a pension.

Q – Why did you decide to pursue stand-up comedy?

A - It has been something I wanted to do since Junior High. I can remember being in the school library with a group of friends and we were all talking about what we wanted to be when we grew up. I said a comedian and they all laughed, so I thought, “wow this is easy.”

Q – How would you describe your act for those who haven’t seen you perform?

A - Observational and personal. I write jokes about everything I go through in life. I used to do a lot of material about being a cop because that was what I was doing at the time. Now I do more about marriage, kids, and owning a house etc. I use a little profanity but try to stay away from the f-bomb.

Q – You’ve done a lot of television. It seems like comedians always end up on TV. Is this the ultimate goal for a comedian?

A - Yes, with television comes exposure; therefore more money. Any comedian who tells you they don't want to do television probably can't get on television.

Q – How did you get involved with the Blue Collar Comedy Tour?

A - The producers asked if I wanted to be part of it and after the success of the original Blue Collar Tour there was no way I could turn it down.



Q – Back in the day, being on the Tonight Show was a monumental feat that could change your life as a comedian. Now, with all the specials and networks devoted to comedy, do you think the market is over saturated with stand-up?

A - Yes. There are too many people watching other programs and there are too many comedians getting TV spots. I think it is harder than ever to stand out.

Q – How often do you stray away from your material in terms of how the flow of the show? I mean, do you ever completely go off course given the circumstance?

A - I like to use every opportunity that I have an audience listening to work on material, which is the only way you grow as a performer. Sometimes I will go up with the intention of working on jokes A, B, and C and after that I don't know where I am gonna go. Sometimes I'll go into the audience and there are those instances when you have to lay into someone.

Q – Have you ever said a joke that offended someone so bad that you later regretted it? If so, what was the situation?

A - Not regretted telling it but regretted they got offended. I had a show back in 2004 and there was a white couple from Alabama and I did a joke about deer whistles on my police car and asked if they knew what a deer whistle was. They were making fun of themselves and laughed as they said "we're not that advanced down there." They got a big laugh from the audience. And I made a comment about I'll slow down some of these jokes for you guys, and went back into my routine never saying anything else about Alabama. The show went well and I was very happy with it. After the show audience members were all coming up to me saying how much they liked the show, etc. Then this old white guy in a suit walked up and looked very upset and said, "I know why you don't like people from Alabama." I said, "Excuse me?" He said, "Because Alabama is 90% black and people from Maine don't like black people." Wow, I thought, I play along with a couple from Alabama about their state being a little slow and he jumps to the conclusion that the whole state of Maine is racist! I would love to bump into that guy now and point out that Maine overwhelmingly voted for Barrack Obama.

Q – Is being on the road just crazy at times?

A - When you are single and on the road I am sure it is a wild time. I enjoy hearing stories from those comics. But when you're married and have been with the same woman for more than ten years and are faithful and you don't use drugs, it doesn't get too crazy. I went to Amsterdam once and I felt like a designated driver at Woodstock.

Q – What are you working on now?

A - Getting ready to shoot my 1-hour stand-up special which will air on Comedy Central and be released as my new DVD/CD.

Q – Anything you wanted to add?

A - Thanks for reading this and check out my website at justonmckinney.com.



BYLINE:

Jason Tanamor is the Editor of Zoiks! Online. He is also the author of the novels, "Hello Lesbian!" and "Anonymous."

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“Pastor Brad – ‘Reshredded: Pastor Brad & Friends.’” – CD Review.

By Bob Zerull

4 Stars:

I am a rock n roll/heavy metal fan. The most irritating thing to me is the genre “Christian Music.” Why? Because there is no such genre as Christian music. If you’re a rapper and you rap about God, then you’re in the rap genre. If you like heavy metal, but you’re screaming for the Lord then you’re in the heavy metal genre. Christianity is a religion, not a genre. So many people are tricked into buying into it. It doesn’t matter what you’re singing about, it matters if it is good. If it is good then it will reach everyone, for example P.O.D., Flyleaf or Pastor Brad.



Recently, a friend of mine dropped off a CD and asked me to review it. It was just labeled Pastor Brad. I’m not positive, but after some research on the Internet I believe the title of the album is “Reshredded: Pastor Brad & Friends.” Pastor Brad is the real deal. If anything, this album is geared toward the guitar loving metal heads than it is church going Christians. It sounds like his influences are AC/DC, Metallica, Ozzy Osbourne, Iron Maiden and Van Halen.

The album is made up of 15 solid songs. What I like about the CD is that the songs aren’t very long. It’s comprised of nothing but guitar solos, but in short spurts they work really well. Pastor Brad plays lead guitar, drums, some bass and some rhythm. There are other players that come in to take lead or bass, but for the most part this is Pastor Brad. He’s a tremendous talent. I would love to hear him in a band setting with a great singer. Some of the riffs are hard and crunchy and some are very melodic.

I hesitate to say the rhythm section isn’t very developed, because that is not true, but if it was developed even more than it already is he’d be playing songs as good as “Orion” or “Call of the Khtulu” by Metallica. Obviously, the first artist you’ll think of when you think of Pastor Brad is Joe Satriani or Steve Vai. I would love to hear Pastor Brad play with them. By the way, did I mention that he is legally blind?



Pastor Brad has an amazing story. He comes from a great family with roots in Christianity. When he was 15 his dad took him to see AC/DC on the “Back in Black” tour. From there it was over. He was bit by the metal bug, specifically the Angus Young bug. He got deep into heavy metal. He started partying and using drugs and driving drunk. After aspirations to be a rock star began to fade, he spent some time with his grandmother who convinced him to go visit his aunt and uncle. From there his Christian roots began to grow and he started to go the way of the Lord. In the late 80’s Pastor Brad began to notice blurry vision and after visits to the eye doctor and regular doctor it was eventually determined that he had a brain tumor. Once they removed the tumor he was left with the loss of 75% of his vision.

Pastor Brad is definitely for the fans of virtuoso guitar playing. If you enjoy instrumental heavy metal with a lot of amazing guitar solos then I highly recommend this. If you’re into heavy metal in general then I’d recommend at least checking it out. It’s just instrumental so it might not be for you, but there are still some pretty amazing licks. In the end, I think it’d be cool if Pastor Brad were able to hit it big. God bless you Pastor Brad, you’re a positive voice that would fit right in the HEAVY METAL genre.



BYLINE:

Bob Zerull is a frequent movie and concert goer who talks about his ventures to arenas and theaters more than any person should be aloud to do. Now, he puts them down on paper. Email him your thoughts at: bzerull19@gmail.com. Also visit: www.cadaverchristmas.com.

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"Nothing better than a plum ambassadorship."

By Melvin Durai

Barack Obama promised to bring change to Washington, but did you see whom he selected as ambassador to Belize? His old college buddy Vinai Thummalapally!

The folks in Belize had better give me a call. For only $9.99, I'll help them learn how to say "Ambassador Thummalapally."



Thummalapally, in case you're wondering, has no experience as a diplomat, but he did pass Obama 's Foreign Service exam, which consisted of a single question: "How much money did you raise for me, bro?"

The correct answer for Thummalapally was "more than 100 grand - and I also told the media that you're the best thing to happen to America since Slim-Fast."

The Colorado business executive also donated $4,500 of his own money for his pal's presidential campaign, while his wife, Barbara, gave $2,800. There were no strings attached, of course, just a note from Barbara that said: "Dear Barack, Vinai and I believe in you so much, we're giving you all the money we had saved for our vacation in sunny Belize. I told Vinai that Belize can wait. Poor guy, he really had his heart set on going. He even read the Lonely Planet Travel Guide and bought a really nice beach umbrella."

Well, perhaps Barbara didn't send a note, but she and Vinai were probably aware that raising money for Obama's campaign could result in an ambassadorship.

Vinai: "We've raised only $50,000. We need to raise more. I don't want to be sent to Cote d'Ivoire."

Barbara: "Yeah, me neither. That would be as bad as going to Ivory Coast."

Vinai: "If we raise a little more, we could go to Belize, Jamaica or even Namibia."

Barbara: "What's so great about Namibia?"

Vinai: "I'm not sure, but that's where Angelina Jolie goes to give birth. Did you know that she's the UN Refugee Agency's Goodwill Ambassador?"



Barbara: "She must not have raised much money for the agency. I'd rather be a Macy's or Saks Fifth Avenue Ambassador."

Obama followed the dubious practice of previous presidents - Republicans and Democrats alike – in rewarding his contributors and friends with plum ambassadorships. A plum ambassadorship, in case you didn't know, is an ambassadorship to a country where plums are grown. Plum ambassadorships are considered more desirable than mango and banana ambassadorships. (Now you know why Thummalapally and others described their fundraising as "very fruitful.")

John Roos, a California-based lawyer who raised more than $500,000 for Obama's campaign, was appointed ambassador to Japan. Poor guy - if he had raised a little more, he could have been off to Paris. That job went to Charles Rivkin, president and CEO of an entertainment company. Obama selected him as an ambassador not just because he had raised almost as much money as a CEO earns, but also because he had produced the children's show “Yo Gabba Gabba!” and, as such, was familiar with foreign-looking creatures.

Louis Susman, a lawyer and investment banker who raised at least $400,000 for Obama's campaign and inauguration, earned himself an ambassadorship to Britain. Talk about a plum post. He'll get to have lunch with Prince Charles, tea with the Queen, and dinner with Susan Boyle. Well, one out of three isn't bad.

So what happens to all the career diplomats, the ones who have tons of foreign service experience, but didn't raise a penny for the president? They get sent to countries in the developing world that don't have the amenities of Tokyo, Paris or London, that don't have the sunny beaches of Belize or Jamaica. But on the bright side, people in these countries can be quite welcoming. In a few remote islands, for example, the people are constantly sending invitations to the U.S. Embassy, eager to have the ambassador for dinner.

Give Obama some credit: he may have smoked pot at one time, but he doesn't want any of his friends to end up in one.

BYLINE:

Melvin Durai is a Manitoba-based writer and humorist. A native of India, he grew up in Zambia and has lived in North America since the early 1980s. Read his humor blog at http://www.Nshima.com Write to him at comments@melvindurai.com.

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“And yet another tip from your Uncle Lar.”

By Jason Tanamor

“You know what makes good crowds? Funny Comedians. That's a tip from your uncle Lar.”

Another tip from Uncle Lar is this. “Everyone should drink. Alcohol is taxed and the money goes to schools,” Reeb said. “So drink up. You’re not a drunk, you’re an education provider.”



Larry Reeb, better known across stages as Uncle Lar, dishes out tips and one-liners to audiences throughout the United States. “I was working at an amusement park in the day, while I did stand-up at night,” Reeb said. “Everyone working there was like 15, so they started calling me Uncle Lar. On stage, after a joke I threw in, ‘That’s a tip from your Uncle Lar,’ and it stuck.”

Having said this, Larry Reeb does have jokes with his advice. In fact, he mixes up each show with new material. “I just do my thing but if it’s an older crowd I will clean it up a little bit,” Reeb said. And if he doesn’t think the material is working, he has a unique way of parting with the less than spectacular jokes. “I try a new joke 4 or 5 times. I try wording it in different ways then if it still doesn't work, I sell it to a new comedian.”

He’s kidding of course. Unless there are some takers.

Reeb, a nationally touring comedian for much of his life, has done everything from radio to television. “I haven't had a day job since 1979. As long as I can make a living doing comedy. I'm a happy guy,” Reeb said.

And for being happy, Reeb doesn’t mind the traveling around part of being a road comic. “I like traveling and I like being alone. But please don't tell my wife I said that,” Reeb said. Although the comedian is very direct and soft-spoken during an interview, Reeb’s sharp wit on stage is built to handle any crowd, including hecklers. During a certain performance, an intoxicated patron shouted, “talk about sex!” Reeb retorted, “your parents shouldn’t have had it.” Of course, he followed this with his trademark saying, “that’s another tip from your Uncle Lar.”



But that isn’t the performance that stands out to Reeb. At a club in Nashville, Reeb was working with another comedian, Ron Douglas. “After the show, Ron went out and drank a lot of vodka,” Reeb said. “He was an alcoholic and the next day, he was found dead. The next week’s comedian called and I told him that Douglas died. Reeb asked, ‘But how did you do?’”

Reeb began his career in Chicago, where he still lives today, at the Comedy Womb, slogan, “Where Comedians Are Born.” “It’s not there anymore,” Reeb said. He did odd jobs while working the clubs at night until in 1979, he managed to do stand-up comedy full time. “I never went to college, if I weren’t doing comedy I’d probably be driving a cab or flipping burgers,” Reeb said. “Any day I don’t have a day job, I’m happy.”

And he’s been happy for a long time. Not bad for a man who decided to become a comedian when he was in high-school. “When I was 15, I was in a speech class in high-school. We could do the speech on anything so I wrote a humorous one and it got laughs,” Reeb said. “The material gets harder as you get older, but you have to sit down and do it. You either know how to do it or don’t.”

Reeb is a regular on the nationally syndicated radio program, “The Bob & Tom Show” and has appeared on HBO, SHOWTIME, VH1, and MTV. His live comedy CD, “It’s a Sick World and I’m a Happy Guy,” is available after his show.



BYLINE:

Jason Tanamor is the Editor of Zoiks! Online. He is also the author of the novels, "Hello Lesbian!" and "Anonymous."

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“Dude Where’s My Car 2: The Hangover.” – Movie Review.

By Bob Zerull

4 1/2 Stars:

As I left the theater after seeing “The Hangover” I heard another patron say that he was surprised that “The Hangover” wasn’t just a bad version of “Dude Where’s My Car.” I immediately thought, wasn’t “Dude Where’s My Car” a bad version of “Dude Where’s My Car.” For all of you out there who are worried that “The Hangover” is even remotely like “Dude Where’s My Car,” relax. “The Hangover” is more like “Swingers” or “Old School.”



“The Hangover” kicks off with Phil (Bradley Cooper) on the phone with the bride to be, informing her that they fucked up and will not make it back in time for the wedding. The next scene is Doug (Justin Bartha), the bachelor, getting fitted for his tux with his future brother in law Alan (Zack Galifianakis). Immediately it is established that Alan is a little on the weird side. Alan is a bit of a loner; he wears a jock strap rather than underwear, and carries a satchel/purse.

Doug and Alan hook up with Phil, a grade school teacher who has no problem taking the kids’ field trip money to use in Vegas for a bachelor party, and Stu (Ed Helms), a dentist who is in a terrible relationship with an unfaithful woman who beats him. They head off to Vegas for a night they’ll never forg…. remember. Once in Vegas they head to the roof of the hotel, do a shot of Jager and head out for the night.

The next scene is of a woman walking out of the hotel room, a chicken running around, and a sofa burning. Stu wakes up with a missing tooth, and Alan wakes up with no pants. He goes to urinate and sees a tiger in the bathroom. Phil wakes up with a hospital wristband on. And worst of all, Doug is missing and none of them can remember a thing.



It’s good to see Todd Phillips (“Old School,” “Road Trip”) with another hit on his hands. “The Hangover” is his funniest movie to date and I’m sure it will stand the test of time. I’ve seen this movie twice now and it only got funnier. In fact the more I talk with my friends about the movie, the funnier it gets.

The Good: This movie is hilarious. The cast is amazing. Bradley Cooper could very well be the next Vince Vaughn. He’s been pretty much a supporting character in the past, but hopefully “the Hangover” gives him the star power to be a leading man. Ed Helms (“The Office,” “The Daily Show”) is yet another example of why “The Daily Show” is the next “SNL” of talent. Hopefully we continue to see him in bigger and bigger roles.

The break out star here is comedian Zack Galifianakis. He could very well be the next Seth Rogan or Will Ferrell from this role. He is so funny in this movie. Whenever the movie slows down he’s there with a one liner to knock you on the ground laughing. Whenever one of the other characters says something funny he’s there with an even funnier line. I am sure we’ll see him in the future; hopefully he doesn’t go the way of Will Ferrell, i.e. “Semi Pro” or “Land of the Lost.”

The Bad: There is a lot of down time between jokes, it is worth it, but that doesn’t change the fact that there is a lot of down time. Also, if you’re looking for realism or logic, this movie totally lacks that. There’s no way these guys wouldn’t have woken up in jail or dead, but who cares, the movie is a great fun ride of hilarity. I highly recommend this movie to anybody who enjoys a good comedy.

BYLINE:

Bob Zerull is a frequent movie and concert goer who talks about his ventures to arenas and theaters more than any person should be aloud to do. Now, he puts them down on paper. Email him your thoughts at: bzerull19@gmail.com. Also visit: www.cadaverchristmas.com.

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“The art of the Post-It giraffe.”

By Bry Schulz

It’s finally time for summer! Who isn’t happy about that? Albinos maybe? Anyway, summer brings along with it an array of fun stuff to do. Unless of course you’re stuck indoors, which lets face it, most of us working stiffs are. But admitting you’re not really working while facing your computer monitor is the first step to… something. Hey, you’re reading this article, aren’t you Mr. Unproductive?



In celebration of our most basic summer right – laziness – I’ve come up with a few of the best ways to kill time at the office this summer.

There’s an art to screwing off or dicking around, whichever you prefer. Most of us have a few screens open on our computers. Not all of them pertain to the j.o.b. And why should they? You’ve got to take breaks right? Heck, Paula over there gets to go out for a smoke break every hour. Why don’t you take a bejeweled break every hour too? This takes us to our first method of summer laziness.

Oh Bejeweled! How I love thee, let me count the ways. Bejeweled is a game much like Tetris, highly addictive and extremely rudimentary. Thinking is optional in this game. You can find it on Yahoo games or if you’ve got Facebook, it's there too. The gist is to remove as many jewels as possible in a given amount of time.

Make sure you play Bejeweled with the volume on! You don’t want to miss the bazaar-o computer voice that congratulates you when you make good moves. “Good” and “Excellent” are oddly sensual coming from a computer monitor. But maybe this is bad advice. Play the game, but low on the volume, because you don’t want to get the boss suspicious. You’ll no doubt become so addicted to this game you’ll start seeing jewels when you close your eyes. I’m so obsessed that recently when looking at my mother-in-law I saw jewels on her face.



Also on the list of summer indoor playthings is a fun web site called www.imdb.com. Think you know everything you want to know about your favorite movie or actor? I doubt it. For example, did you know that Jessica Alba has lots of talent in her family? “Her second cousin is skateboarding legend Steve "Salba" Alba.” Seriously, that’s the kind of information you can store away for a later date. Like binge drinking with your younger sister and hoping to wow her friends.

I had to recruit a little help for this next one – various iPhone apps. I am not lucky enough (lucky = rich) to own one myself but I know plenty of folks are. I enlisted the help of my iPhone user friend and here’s what she recommended for apps on the holy grail of all gadgets - the FML app.

This is a version of the FML website. If you’re not familiar you should GET familiar. Fmylife.com is a fabulous way to make yourself feel better. She also suggested Gaia, which is a game similar to Bejeweled! Glorious! And if you’re into celeb gossip there’s always the TMZ and E! apps to fulfill all of your needs there.

And my last suggestion for helping yourself enjoy your pitiful time indoors at work is to make something! That’s right get crafty. I mean when you think about it you’re surrounded by craft making tools. You’ve certainly got tape. I’m sure you’ve got colored paper (Post-Its), you’ve got markers (Sharpie), you’ve got scissors (don’t hurt yourself), and maybe even glue depending on your profession. So craft it up.

I got the idea for a giraffe. Made entirely out of tape, Post-Its, and paper clips, artfully decorated with my Sharpie pen.

The idea here is simple: make the most of your time. It’s hell sitting inside watching the summer sizzle right outside your window. It’s like it’s beckoning you to come out and play. And who says you can’t stick it to the man for sticking you indoors? No one. Well, maybe a few people, but let’s ignore them. Good luck.

BYLINE:

Bry Schulz is a writer, photographer, and mother who really hates squash. Not necessarily the game but definitely the vegetable.

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"The Mario Bunch."

By Ryan McFate

Ryan McFate takes a classic TV show, "The Brady Bunch" and modernizes it with two of the best video game heroes ever - Mario and Luigi.





BYLINE:

Ryan McFate is a high school student whose hobby is making YouTube videos. He wants to go to school for computers. He also happens to be Jason Tanamor's son.

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“Vinnie Brand has his own ‘brand’ of comedy.”

By Jason Tanamor

I’ve been covering stand-up comedy for a lot of years and have yet to come across Vinnie Brand. But I’m glad I did, because the comedian showcases his own ‘brand’ of hilarious comedy, even though there’s a very small percentage that it could be about you.

I recently chatted with the comic about his life in the business – literally.



Q – You once owned a construction company and flower shop. That’s kind of a contrast, isn’t it?

A - When I owned the Construction Company and the flower shop there was a lot of conflict! I’d have to answer the phones in different voices with different attitudes. It was supposed to be my ex wife’s (we were still married at the time) flower shop but I ended up doing most of the work. Turns out she doesn’t have that rosy personality.

Q – Do you find yourself missing these businesses?

A - I love construction but don’t miss the business. My dad, who was a union Steamfitter and master plumber, told me one day “Stay the fuck out of this business, it’ll kill you.” He died at 60 after 44 years in construction. He was the funniest guy I ever met, and whenever I go by one of his projects, I think of him and smile. He built lasting stuff, and that really means something to me. I’ll see big construction projects and I’m really in awe of those guys - the architects, engineers, workers, all really proud symbols of American ingenuity and know how. Still, I don’t miss it enough to want to do it again.

As for the flower business, I don’t miss that at all. I know a lot about flowers, but I don’t talk about it much. I’ll plant stuff with my daughters and they’re excited about it growing and that’s the only thing in flowers I need.

Q – Why did you decide to pursue stand-up comedy?

A - The comedy boom was on in the late 80’s and I thought “I can do that; it’s easy compared to what I’m doing now.” I went on stage at an open mic and fell in love with performing on the first night. I killed. The next time on stage was so bad that I was ready to quit. Another comic talked me into trying a third time and I was really hooked again.

Q – How would you describe your act for those who haven’t seen you perform?

A - I’d say this, I’m in the moment. I have a set, but it isn’t canned. Nothing I have is written down, it’s in my head. Little lines evolve over time and I let my mood take me wherever it wants. So, if you see me in a happy mood, it’s a happy set. If I’m pissed off, you’ll see the same stuff but angry. It makes performing a lot of fun. I don’t have to pretend or act at all. The material part is mostly about my family or the world as I see it and as it pertains to me so you get a personal show no matter what.



Q – Back in the day, being on the Tonight Show was a monumental feat that could change your life as a comedian. Now, with all the specials and networks devoted to comedy, do you think the market is over saturated with stand-up?

A - I don’t think so at all. There’s certainly a lot to choose from, but there’s lot of people out there! The late night shows don’t do comics every night, so they’re great to catch when you see them. The biggest difference now is that Comedy Central puts out a lot of specials so it seems that there are more than ever. They are a comedy network so naturally they view it as their platform. As for over saturation, the news every day is tough - that’s oversaturated! I can’t get over saturated laughing, but worrying about the Iranians and North Koreans having nukes, thanks, but I’m full already.

Q – How often do you stray away from your material in terms of how the flow of the show? I mean, do you ever completely go off course given the circumstance?

A - Yes, I go off topic frequently. Like I said, I know what I want to do but I don’t go on like a robot. Guys that do that bore me. I like the art form. I like being off the cuff and I like being in the moment.

Q – Have you ever said a joke that offended someone so bad that you later regretted it?

A - I’ve offended people but I can’t really recall regretting it. Comedy has to offend sometimes. Most of my stuff is autobiographical, so if someone is offended they’re offended by my life, and that offends me. It’s comedy. If someone gets offended, and they have, my general attitude is that person is too serious. The world has a lot going on, if you find yourself upset at a comedian, chances are you need to read the papers more.

Q – Tell me about The Stress Factory Comedy Club. How did this come about?

A - The Stress Factory came about because I was doing stand-up at some open mics around the state but wanted more stage time. At this point, I already had three kids, so doing the road was rough. I started a little open mic, ironically it was in the building I now occupy but back then it was a dance club on Sunday nights. It was for Rutgers kids and had a five dollar cover. When the clubs around the state found out I was doing this they blackballed me from ever working there again. That was completely ridiculous. Since they blackballed me and I couldn’t work anywhere, I decided to open my own place. I named the club because at the time I had the flower shop, the construction company, three kids, I was trying to perform and I was preparing to get divorced. My life just didn’t feel like the “Chuckle Hut,” it felt like The Stress Factory, hence, the name.

Q – What are you working on now?

A - I’m working on material all the time. I’m also very active with my family and they’re my priority. As for comedy, I’m writing and producing a pilot. Won’t tell you what it’s about till it’s in the can, which will be August of this year. I will give you a scoop though when I get it done.

Q – Anything you wanted to add?

A - If you’re my ex wife and you’re reading this, STOP. IT’S OVER. Anyway, the jokes about you are hysterical even if they’re personal and real. (I particularly enjoy the cremation jokes and the headstone jokes, crowd favorites, thanks for the inspiration).

IF MY KIDS ARE READING - If I do some joke about you that you don’t like, think of the crap you put me through to make me write it!! I’d rather have not gone through the crap, but since you made me, you’re in the act.

If you’re not in my act, congratulations, you probably haven’t annoyed me much.

BYLINE:

Jason Tanamor is the Editor of Zoiks! Online. He is also the author of the novels, "Hello Lesbian!" and "Anonymous."

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